Puppets on Life’s Stage

 Judging by appearance and performity has caused us to loose our minds shoving humans into two boxes that in biological reality just isn’t true. Never has been. Exposing this truth has caused a sea of hate from those who cannot conceptualize that others can have joy for being different from the norm society has cultivated.

Demonizing others while having no idea of your true biological complexity is feeding that bigotry that we are all capable of if we close our minds to the difficult truths of life’s beautiful complexities. It’s human nature to want to fit in with others and feel uneasy about those who may not fit our spoon fed narrative. Accepting that feeling, yet chosing to reject its validity allows you to access humanity deeply.

If no one asks you to define your identity, that is a privilege that should not equate to better than. You’re lucky to not have to navigate a world not meant for your comfort. It takes nothing froom you to accept other ways of being. Period. Joy is not flaunting. Maybe ask yourself where your joy went? Can you feel joy for others expressing their joy?

No one is asking anyone to loose their identity. It doesn’t work that way. Being “creeped” out by another human being should be a red flag for you to ask “yourself” questions about how that might just be self created and why you might be afraid of what you don’t know. Maybe a realization of someone just being nice to you isn’t a “come-on”. Even if it is, how do you handle a heteronormative “come-on” if you’re not interested? Do the same. It’s not rocket science. Not everything is about sex! How shocking…

We are extremely complex individuals that spend why too much time judging others by appearance alone. We are all performing binary gender ideology daily in some form or another and never asking ourselves why, because for most it is intuitive and validating. For others it’s a horrible miss match, for still others somewhere in between. We are not meant to be cookie cutter duplicates or we would be boring robots.

We all “over” perform to fit a standard narrative. Macho men exhaust themselves over performing masculinity. Why? I did it and still do to an extent, even though it validates my comfort. We change over time as well, developing different appearances chosen or not by aging.

You can totally fit the binary norm to a tee, but do you know your biology really? Should it matter if we stop the crazy train of heteronormality as a “norm” without all of this information?

Can’t we all just be kind and understanding of how hard fitting into the same size shoe has become?

The answer is not testing every humans complex biological makeup. The answer is to not care and let people be themselves.

Laws are there to check moral violations that “do not include” owning other peoples bodies or expressions. It’s all so simple if we choose the later and stop putting our preferences on others.

It’s just too exhausting by design. How hard do we have to twist society into a pretzel to serve the needs of the overly uptight bigots of the world who actually believe they are the dominant beings, when in reality they are just the not so interesting beings that so desparately want to get attention they can only achieve by demonizing others.

Give that some thought….

Reflections on a Sunday

Photo by Kaye Cornish https://unsplash.com/photos/Uq3gTiPlqRo?              utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditShareLink

It’s Sunday. A distinctively American tradition of church attendance by many, clearly not all faiths, will be practiced by me today because we are at an undeniable crossroads that will not let one of us bury our heads in the sand and not pay attention.

As you all know, I clearly always have something to say. So, today I will give you my sermon on the mound of cyperspace. You have free will, so take it or leave it. It is mine to own.

We are born as individuals with truly innate powers of creative thinking and being. Before we develop those powers we are taught to suppress them, fit into boxes that are natural for some and violationally limiting for others. We are taught to judge and ridicule those that defy these boxes causing emotional harm instead of using our own instinctual ability to learn and grow our lens of perspective with love and compassion.

Before we are innately able to decide for ourselves we are indoctrinated with organized religion’s fear of free will, because doing so may erase their need to exist. We are taught to look at a flawed document handed down, interpreted many years after the events not by the authors of the journey, but hand selected translations from languages impossible to dissect unquestionably.

The story may indeed be valid, and clearly the story of Jesus is one of love and compassion, but the organized dogma is shackled by chains of fear to strip you of your self esteem, your ability to question what remains unanswered in these documents, while being told they are clear. Questioning is our human nature that should not be repressed.

You are born to a family that has chosen which document to follow, or not in some cases, making your will restricted if you question those that are your only reference for care and love at the time of your own development when you want to please. This shuts down the questioning which is our undeniable gift to reason and be human.

The one undeniable truth is love and dignity. You don’t need anyone to teach you this. It is our innate trait that is given to us freely at birth. Being determined to unlearn doctrine and return to the state of wonder, inquiry and compassion is the hard choice, but the clear path to a well lived life which may lead you to a building of worship or an inner building of your own design.

That is our collective church we were born into. I hope to see you all return there to build hope and live authenticity in the service of humanities survival where we question and wonder at the awe of life. The dialog with self is a dialog with God, if they do exist.

Disillusionment

 

                                             Anne Louise Germaine Necker de Stael-Holstein 

                                                        by artist Marie-Eleonore Godefroid

On the precipice of a country revolving backwards to embrace the worst of past atrocities I am left with one word that signifies the last 6 years of back-peddling. Disillusionment. The present should always represent hope, a mirror of reflection that informs our daily journeys and morals with a keen eye to bettering our future. I have never been so disillusioned or distraught about our future as a species.

We've somehow lost true understanding of key definitions of human nature: kindness, empathy, chivalry, character, and moral fiber, to name a few. I'm not talking the Disney movie type, but the flawed kind with dirty hands, no white horses, moments of anger and immediate remorse.  That is real, that is human. We've replaced these aspirations with greed, gluttony, self-righteousness, self-centeredness, and bullying pulpits of arrogance. We have centuries of lessons on why religion should not have power to dictate behavior, yet the hold and destruction continues without accountability. No one NEEDS religion to be good. That is a fact.

Disillusioned masses cannot help a society function if stuck in the fear of rebuttal. Divided we are conquered, pure and simple. Prostate we are harmful to the most vulnerable. Clearly, I do not have the answers for what will make us work together for the betterment of human kind. This is where we all sit in our disbelief, our shame, our utter demoralizing fear. 

I write, because screaming at the top of my lungs remains unsatisfying. We have a crippled world right now, because gluttonous wealthy soul-less creatures have found out that philanthropy will no longer puff their egos, charity work no longer lift their external facade.  So money is horded in off shore accounts, loaded into accounts for offspring to spend on million dollar birthday parties. We see them wholly and it is the most frightening presence we cannot seem to comprehend. How do we make philanthropy stylish again and hold businesses, no matter how large, accountable and rewarded for good, punished for bad. 

It is important that we all openly question where there are no clear answers. This is the time for philosophy, art, and historical oratory and performance in every medium. The humanities are called upon when there is no clarity, there is only darkness. We can be led out of the gloom, but we need brave souls mirrored from the past of flawed characters who passionately stood up against the odds and said "no more".  

Social media and lack of strong journalism from our networks and news sources have left us rudder-less. Social media has become our only fast reliable source, but it is also our most cut-throat, evil mean spirited medium. 

This should be a time of invention and creation. There has never been a time where access and exposure to information, regardless of economics is at an all time high, yet few take full advantage except in the game playing, suspending reality venue. I see nothing wrong with escapism in moderation, if weighed with deep learning, deep questioning seeking sources of wonderment. 

Who are we, really? What are we actually capable of? Is the answer going to be destruction or  greatness. It is literally ours to decide. Germaine Necker de Stael died on her return to Paris after a sojourn through England and Europe in disillusionment. She disliked Napoleon immensely. Things don't seem to change much when progress is met with tyranny. I'm with you Madame de Stael.

 

Where do we go from here?

I'm currently reading Lyndsey Stonebridge's "Writing & Righting: Literature in the Age of Human Rights" Oxford University Press, 2021.  A short readable volume on current events melding with past events through the eyes of literature and critical thought sublime, with a thorough cast of characters....Arendt, Dunne, Woolf, Saadi, Freud, Sontag....Balibar's ''intensive universality' working for new interpretations of the principles of citizenship' through collective local and transnational action".  What truly are we capable of collectively? 

Inevitably, my daily life is a perplexing journey of questions followed by in-depth research and analysis which often leads to dead ends of philosophical gray, mundane, depressing, empty despondency about human existence and it's peril...and yet...hope. Then I walk outside in a vibrant sun filled awakening of human activity at the fringe of the COVID-19 year long bowels and breathe the stale air through my double mask....hope.  I am still capable of hope.

60 Minutes UFO's

Apparently, our government has known for some time we are not alone. Their decision to not believe in our ability to digest such news is an indictment to our gluttonous egomaniac leaders and shape shifters who arrogantly think FOR us.  We remain ill equipped for life because we don't garner trust and faith in our abilities in critical thought.  A constant game of red rover with our brains, shoving black and white answers that distracts from forced intellectual understanding and cognition of gray material.  Are we capable of grasping life's complexities? How can we know if we are consistently led like wolf packs?

Do we accept there are more sentient beings who are watching us, waiting to intervene to save us from utter stupidity and our own destruction?  Or are they set to devour us like the sharks devour octopi, delicate intellectual beings who live approximately 365 days?  Is life meant to be long and mundane or short and impressive? 

I can honestly tell you, the last 20 years of my life 40-60 have been the most learned, thought provoking, difficult, and rewarding.  The first 40 seems to have been only in preparation for my souls inner development to begin.  I still have little knowledge of what it takes to make money for money's sake, to my financial detriment.  My inner growth is another story, gained richness no amount of money could replace or purchase. 

There is no doubt in my mind we are being asked, as humans, to evolve.  There are those who are ill equipped for this demand, and they are of great danger to human kind.  Citizenship must be redefined.  We must become citizens of the world without borders.  That task is monumental and an evolution we have never been able to realize.  We must or we dance on the edge of destruction at our own hands.  Are we willing?  Are we worthy? Are we capable? Will the unidentified flying objects help us, watch us implode, or finish us off?  I hope we can show them something impressive.

An open letter to Trans Youth

I published an op ed in the Daily Beast.  It's time to be brave and stand in your truth.

An open letter to Trans Youth and Allies 

Can Religion Define Goodness?

Religion has a belief that goodness comes from being of religious faith, that goodness is only achievable through faith in God, instead of faith in self. Read that again, because if you look at history you will see this blind faith allows us to let bad people walk amongst us protected by a facade. This is why generation after generation we see horrible abuses of power within the religious confines of adoration, clinging desperately because we want to believe blindly in goodness without condemnation. Goodness is a choice that can be guided by faith. Some people need faith to be their inner voice, their judge.

All of this is backwards and has been for so very long. My first paragraph leads you to assume I’m atheist. I am not. Why do you assume this? Because your belief that faith in God is associated with blindness. The issue here is the human nature in wanting to have things be easy. This is where religion fails us miserably. Easy in religion equates to laziness, the sin of slothfulness. I argue we are all creatures of complex thought and actions. So much so, we are over burdened with making all this complexity fit into absolutes. We crave for simplicity because of life’s complexity. Religion allows us to suspend that life complexity with blind faith.

There are those in the world that meet these challenges, when truth is revealed, with adaptation. There are others that fight desperately to hold on to their blind faith regardless of what is placed before them. Societies work best when there is an appropriate balance between the two. Those that are adaptable largely outnumber those that aren’t, except in societies where the balance is in the opposite, where the balance is larger amongst those that have blind religious faith. In the past, both functioned with occasional battles with each other, yet remaining separate with borders. History has shown us time and time again the horrible abuses of blind faith.

Today, in the world, we have a precipice. These human views cannot coexist. Why? Those that were happy enough to have blind religious faith are asked to change where they cannot. Those that are adaptable can no longer tolerate the religious blind faith. There is a turbulent struggle that is most exemplified in the United States under the Trump regime. The timing is significate because many countries around the world have been dealing with destruction, trying to challenge strong conservative religious morays. For some reason, the United States has always believed in freedom from religious rule. I would argue this is why we, desperately flawed though we are, have remained a country with power, one admired around the world. This is more complex than I present here, but the challenge is important.

Every day we allow religion to be used by a charlatan and his cult is a day we sink deeper into despair and ruin. We are in turmoil because we are distracted by so much that desperately needs fixing. It is a dire emergency. Yet, we still think we can look back and wish for a return to a fantasy that never existed. We were delusional about who and what we were and now we are delusional about what we must face. There is no going back after the suture has been torn off to show the gapping wound. That wound cannot be healed without our nurturing attention or we will bleed out.

The Measure of Our Worth

Knowledge is power, yet we have such pride in ignorance today. We are powerless when we cling to freedoms that are solely imaginary.

With no interest in critical thought, we prop up “celebrity” on imaginary statues without regard for their ability to contribute intellectually or spiritually.

Even “celebrity”, be it politician or artist, has devolved into anyone who amasses great wealth devoid of ethics, sometimes even talent. Many born into prosperous looting of possessions, lifting themselves by their gold encrusted bootstraps, void of humility.

We hastily build these imaginary statues, stars imbedded in a prized walk of fame, where talent and worth rub shoulders with gluttony.

We have little regard for prophets of the mind who offer salvation for our souls from autocratic demons intent on destruction of human worth, lapping up the blood of our children’s future, while we watch helplessly gasping for breath.

We cannot breath by our own self-inflicted strangulation.

A world created on love alone cannot weather these storms of rage without warriors of critical thought and artist value leading the way. Wealth must be measured differently. We cannot sustain this gluttony of arrogance.

Loves nativity cannot be shattered if human value remains our most cherished trait.

If every person is given value as their commodity to plant in the soil to withstand the elements of life, weathered but not beaten, given the freedom and responsibility to nurture the mind first, the ego last.
Maybe…just maybe…we can achieve a world worthy of our presence through our own humility that cannot be for sale.

I hope we are worthy of such an awakening! We do not need organized religions to lead us astray again and again. We need organized self actualized love of ourselves and our innate power to control a world we can design for us all. That is the greatest definition of faith.

Vincent’s 167th Birthday: The van Gogh Family Lineage through Tragedy and Service to Humanity

I’m revamping my 2-year-old story in celebration of the 167th birthday of Vincent van Gogh with additional links and information. Let’s celebrate this great artist while we quarantine during the coronavirus! What you don’t know about the descendants of Vincent van Gogh is amazing and relevant!

March 30th marks the birth of the great artist, Vincent Willem van Gogh. I own prints of many of his paintings that hang on walls in my home. Many years have been spent in admiration and trying to understand a deeply moving man. When I was very young, one of my favorite songs was Vincent by Don McLean (famous for his song American Pie). While others were into heavy metal, I turned the other way and found kinship in folk pop-singer songwriters. Rhapsodizing about Vincent’s life and struggles can be left to reading Van Gogh: The Life by Steven Naifeh and Gregory White Smith (highly recommended).

Vincent meandered from a young age trying to discover what his passion and service would be. It wasn’t until he turned 27 that he began to become an artist, and by the age of 37 he was dead. Vincent was self-taught for the most part, copying his mother’s sketches while young, transpiring into putting out 10 years’ worth of amazing work that never sold during his lifetime. NOT one painting! I could go on…..instead, I’ll leave you with a story on the man who consistently sees into my soul and inspires me to follow my heart. Bear with me through the facts while the tragedy transpires.

You can find basic details of Vincent’s life on-line easily. Vincent(¹) was born 30 Mar 1853 in Groot-Zundert, Netherlands, and died 29 July 1890 at the Ravoux’s Inn in Auvers, France with no issue (for non-genealogist this means no children). What isn’t as easy to find are the details of his ancestry, much of which is covered in The Complete Letters of Vincent van Gogh¹, 3 volumes first published in 1958 (I own the third edition collection, 2000, pictured above). His sister-in-law provided a memoir of Vincent outlining the family lineage, referencing Annales Genealogiques by Arnold Buchelius which states “Jacob van Gogh (16th c. family already established in Holland) lived at the time in Utrecht…. Jan, Jacob’s son, sold wine and books….”. The family lineage had generations of connections to art and literature. The name van Gogh is believed to be derived from the small-town Gogh on the German frontier.²

I will discuss some of his descendants through his brother Theo who had only one child. Vincent was the oldest of six children, three boys and three girls. The first born boy was stillborn leaving 5 siblings, Anna Cornelia (two daughters), Theodorus-Theo (one son), Elisabeth Huberta-Lies (5 children), Willemina Jacoba-Wil (no issue), Cornelious Vincent-Cor (no issue). Today I will focus on Theo’s only child Vincent, hopefully later I will have more time to dig into the other offspring of his siblings.  Cor died (age 33) volunteering for the Anglo-Boer War, either in action or as a suicide was later suspected.³

Bare with me as we trudge through the countless Theos and Vincents!! Our Vincent van Gogh’s brother Theo(¹) had one child…. Vincent Willem van Gogh(²) (named after his love of his brother). Vincent(²) was born in Paris, 31 Jan 1890, the same year as Vincent’s(¹) death, with his own father, Theo(¹) dying 6 months after Vincent(¹) at the age of 33! This gives you an idea of Theo’s(¹) devotion to Vincent(¹), leaving his wife and 6-month-old to rush to Vincent’s side as he died in Auvers, probably in poor health himself.

**Not much is mentioned of Johanna Bonger vanGogh, the widow of Theo, except that she and her son worked their whole lives to honor and preserve Vincent’s(²) legacy.  That changed recently with the new biography, Everything for Vincent: The Life of Jo van Gogh-Bonger, by Hans Luijten, senior researcher at the Van Gogh Museum.4 I’m looking forward to the English translation later this year finding more out about this woman who was able to sustain herself and son as a widow in the 19^th century!

Vincent(²), Theo’s son, called “the Engineer” was born 31 Jan 1890 in Paris, and died 28 Jan 1978, in Laren, North Holland, Netherlands. This Vincent(2) continued his mother’s devotion to the legacy of van Gogh by establishing the Van Gogh Foundation in the 1960’s where van Gogh’s collection was transferred. In 1973 the State of the Netherlands designed the Van Gogh Museum where the collection now resides. This family’s devotion is why we have the amazing amount of his work.

This Vincent(²) , son of Theo(¹)who died at the age of 33, had two boys and a girl….yes, you guessed it, one son was named Theo(²). This Theo(²) was born 5 Nov 1920 in Amsterdam. My heart skipped a beat when I learned of his execution by the Nazis at the age of 24, 8 Mar 1945. He was a member of the resistance movement. Vincent’s(²) oldest son Johan, born in 1922 and died 21 Feb, 2019 had a prolific live in the Dutch secret service.5

Johan’s son, yes…another Theo(³), was a film director, producer, and actor who was brutally murdered in 2004 by a Dutch Moroccan who was not happy about his outspoken views on Islamic woman’s rights. Yes, there is a book about this murder and its meaning, Murder in Amsterdam: The Death of Theo van Gogh and the Limits of Tolerance by Ian Burma. Theo’s(3) last film was “06” about the murder (ironically) of an outspoken gay libertarian, Pim Fortuyn. Theo(³) created a short film (2004), before his assassination, with now controversial activist Ayaan Hirsi Ali, called Submission. Theo was murdered for making this political film, written by Ali, about how many women are treated by men under the Koran teachings.6

Can I say, “What the…?” This family history would make an amazing mini-series beyond focusing on Vincent the painter!

My white board

Theo’s(³) son, Lieuwe van Gogh, grandson of Johan, great grandson of Vincent the engineer, and great great grandson of Theo, brother of our Vincent van Gogh, is an ARTIST! Born in 1992 in the Netherlands and is on Facebook! https://www.facebook.com/lieuwe.vangogh   He was only 12 years old when his father was murdered. I can’t imagine….

Lieuwe van Gogh is embracing more than artistry, Lieuwe is also an activist performer following in his ancestor’s footsteps. This video from the band Frontliner features Lieuwe, who is a Muay Thai boxer, and has a powerful message. Watch until the end.

To learn more, please click on the many highlighted references!! Go visit the Fogg Museum in Cambridge, MA, or the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston, or any other place that has a van Gogh painting on exhibit. A picture never does his work justice. My most moving moment, for me, was at the Boston MFA in 2000 when the exhibit Face to Face, the Portraits (book in picture above) came to Boston. The iconic self-portrait, front and center, and getting very close and seeing the thick strokes of paint then walking slowly further away to see the painting evolve.

Happy Birthday, Vincent! Cheers!

Vincent and Theo at rest together again.

Descendants of the Van Gogh line

¹The Complete Letters of Vincent van Gogh, Bulfinch Press: Little, Brown and Company, Boston, New York, London, third edition, 2000, xv.

²Ibid.

3The Unknown Van Gogh: the life of Cornelis van Gogh, from the Netherlands to South Afrika, Chris Schoeman, Cape Town, Zebra Press, 2015.

4Due to be released in English in later 2020. Published in Dutch Sep 2019. https://www.vangoghmuseum.nl/en/news-and-press/press-releases/book-launch-all-for-vincent-the-life-of-jo-van-gogh-bonger 

Review: The Art Newspaper, Martin Bailey 18 Septemper 2019, https://www.theartnewspaper.com/amp/review/van-gogh-s-sister-in-law, Diaries of Johanna Bonger  https://bongerdiaries.org/dagboek_jo_1

5 https://www.theartnewspaper.com/blog/the-astonishing-life-of-johan-van-gogh

6Submission https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGtQvGGY4S4 **warning this video is an adult topic and can be disturbing to some.

Albert Camus

NEITHER VICTIMS NOR EXECUTIONERS by Albert Camus

Yes, we must raise our voices. Up to this point, I have refrained from
appealing to emotion. We are being torn apart by a logic of history which
we have elaborated in every detail--a net which threatens to strangle us.
It is not emotion which can cut through the web of a logic which has
gone to irrational lengths, but only reason which can meet logic on its
own ground. But I should not want to leave the impression... that any
program for the future can get along without our powers of love and
indignation. I am well aware that it takes a powerful prime mover to get
men into motion and that it is hard to throw one's self into a struggle
whose objectives are so modest and where hope has only a rational basis--
and hardly even that. But the problem is not how to carry men away; it is
essential, on the contrary, that they not be carried away but rather that
they be made to understand clearly what they are doing.

To save what can be saved so as to open up some kind of future--that is
the prime mover, the passion and the sacrifice that is required. It
demands only that we reflect and then decide, clearly, whether humanity's
lot must be made still more miserable in order to achieve far-off and
shadowy ends, whether we should accept a world bristling with arms where
brother kills brother; or whether, on the contrary, we should avoid
bloodshed and misery as much as possible so that we give a chance for
survival to later generations better equipped than we are.

For my part, I am fairly sure that I have made the choice. And, having
chosen, I think that I must speak out, that I must state that I will
never again be one of those, whoever they be, who compromise with murder,
and that I must take the consequences of such a decision. The thing is
done, and that is as far as I can go at present.... However, I want to
make clear the spirit in which this article is written.

We are asked to love or to hate such and such a country and such and
such a people. But some of us feel too strongly our common humanity to
make such a choice. Those who really love the Russian people, in
gratitude for what they have never ceased to be--that world leaven which
Tolstoy and Gorky speak of--do not wish for them success in power politics,
but rather want to spare them, after the ordeals of the past, a new and
even more terrible bloodletting. So, too, with the American people, and
with the peoples of unhappy Europe. This is the kind of elementary truth
we are likely to forget amidst the furious passions of our time.

Yes, it is fear and silence and the spiritual isolation they cause that
must be fought today. And it is sociability and the universal inter-
communication of men that must be defended. Slavery, injustice, and lies
destroy this intercourse and forbid this sociability; and so we must
reject them. But these evils are today the very stuff of history, so
that many consider them necessary evils. It is true that we cannot
"escape history," since we are in it up to our necks. But one may propose
to fight within history to preserve from history that part of man which
is not its proper province. That is all I have to say here. The "point"
of this article may be summed up as follows:

Modern nations are driven by powerful forces along the roads of power
and domination. I will not say that these forces should be furthered
or that they should be obstructed. They hardly need our help and, for
the moment, they laugh at attempts to hinder them. They will, then,
continue. But I will ask only this simple question: What if these
forces wind up in a dead end, what if that logic of history on which
so many now rely turns out to be a will o' the wisp? What if, despite
two or three world wars, despite the sacrifice of several generations
and a whole system of values, our grandchildren--supposing they survive--
find themselves no closer to a world society? It may well be that the
survivors of such an experience will be too weak to understand their
own sufferings. Since these forces are working themselves out and since
it is inevitable that they continue to do so,there is no reason why
some of us should not take on the job of keeping alive, through the
apocalyptic historical vista that stretches before us, a modest
thoughtfulness which, without pretending to solve everything, will
constantly be prepared to give some human meaning to everyday life.
The essential thing is that people should carefully weight the price
they must pay....

All I ask is that, in the midst of a murderous world, we agree to reflect
on murder and to make a choice. After that, we can distinguish those
who accept the consequences of being murderers themselves or the
accomplices of murderers, and those who refuse to do so with all their
force and being. Since this terrible dividing line does actually exist,
it will be a gain if it be clearly marked. Over the expanse of five
continents throughout the coming years an endless strugle is going to
be pursued between violence and friendly persuasion, a struggle in
which, granted, the former has a thousand times the chances of success
than that of the latter. But I have always held that, if he who bases his
hopes on human nature is a fool, he who gives up in the face of circum-
stances is a coward. And henceforth, the only honorable course will be
to stake everything on a formidable gamble: that words are more powerful
than munitions.

Ted Bundy's Lens on Male Behavior: Why we should listen (revisiting a year old post)

Ted Bundy High School Yearbook

---

The Netflix series “Mindhunter” Season one, episode 3 based on 2 FBI agents who helped establish the FBI’s elite Serial Crime Unit. One of the most interesting characters on this show is Dr. Wendy Carr, based on real life Boston College professor Ann W. Burgess, in the 1970’s and 80’s. The first get together of all 3 main characters is enlightening in today’s nightmare of billionaire, CEO controlled business and politics.

Agent: “What is your book about?”

Dr. Wendy Carr: “It’s about white -collar criminals, men not so different from your Edmund Kemper (serial killer).”

Agent: “How do you think the men you study are similar to Kemper?”

Dr. Carr: “Well, first of all, they are psychopaths. I study captains of industry: IBM, MGM, Ford, Exxon, you name it. And, sure, all these men have wives, kids, dogs, goldfish, but not because they stopped being psychopaths, but because they just had different leanings.”

Agent: “But you think they have the same underlying personality traits?”

Dr. Carr: “Well, Kemper shows a total lack of remorse. A lack of inner emotional structure, no ability to reflect on the experience of others.”

Holy crap! This is Donald Trump and everyone in his inner circle. This is why Bloomberg is arrogant enough to think he can buy his way into the democratic nomination. Those that climb to the top in business try very hard to convince us that they are successful in more than moneyed prowess, but in gaining our trust solely based on their success. Clearly, we need to examine why we put so much trust in them to our determent.

Referenced in this exchange is the book “The Mask of Sanity” which was instrumental in the study of psychopathic personality. We would do well to understand these striking similarities we are dealing with today.

“A person of this type chooses his victims for a reason. His victims are young attractive women. Women are possessions. Beings which are subservient, more often than not, to males. Women are merchandise. From the pornography, through Playboy, on up to the evening news. So there is no denying the sexual component. However, sex has significance only in the context of a much broader scheme of things, that is possession, control, violence.” Ted Bundy in his own words, on The Ted Bundy Tapes, Netflix 2019 Documentary.

From late 1986 to 1989 I lived in Tallahassee, Florida. My partner at the time was a masters student at FSU, so while not a student I was in the throws of events there. I lived a block away from the sorority where a female student was dropped on the front steps with the name of another fraternity that members of Pi Kappa Alpha emblazoned on the victims body. 1988 sorority rape case revisited

Read that article. Heart wrenching all the more after 30 years of white male privileged culture run amok.

This 1988 event was the 10 year anniversary at FSU of Ted Bundy murdering 2 sorority girls of Chi Omega and beating 3 others. New Documentary includes Bundy tapes

I remember the culture at FSU that allowed these events, 10 years apart, to happen. I remember in 1988 we heard of how this freshman girl was drunk and partially responsible for her own rape. Had she just not gotten so drunk, she wouldn’t have been led to a party that never existed to be repeatedly raped and ridiculed like a non-human. If women just “didn’t do” what men flaunt as their right and privilege (sowing your oats, boys will be boys, just partying).

I lived a block away from frat/sorority row and moved as soon as the one year lease was up, further away from this crazy privileged white row houses strewn with BMW’s and Mercedes, handed out like candy to the privileged elite of FSU frat/sorority row. Don’t get me wrong, partying is a part of college life that you cannot extricate, but partying should never include dehumanizing behavior of any sort or complete expulsion from the University of the frat/sorority and individuals should happen.

We are now at the 40th anniversary of the execution of Ted Bundy. So, while I’m revisiting this hell with no relish, I’d like to use it to see, this is about one thing. The protectionism of a white male privileged class…arrogance. Bundy’s own words above are very icy in revealing, not only his psychosis, but male behavior, specifically white male behavior. I have consistently heard, from loads of white men who isolate their ears from progressive voices, new technology (that tends to open discussions and difficult banter, like facebook, twitter, etc) that our world is changing for the worst. They long for being able to cat call, demean others and call it “just joking”. Their world, of people just letting them dominant the room, is changing and they don’t know what to do, so they do what has always been available to them…anger, defiant arrogance. 

Not every white male becomes a Ted Bundy by a long shot, but you can see why he is an example of how privileged male ideology, as he states above, is allowed to walk away so easily from accountability. Watching this documentary on Bundy as he arrogantly looks at the cameras, confidently defends himself oblivious of reality, is so surreal when you realize much of this is on display by our own President, who lies with impunity, arrogantly telling the press his lies are truths and they should learn from his wisdom of fantasy land ideology. I’m sorry…he is dangerous. Bundy was a stanch Republican, a converted Mormon, a stand up citizen who campaigned for Nixon, hopnopped with Republican elites of the 60’s and early 70’s. Much of the reason he wasn’t found earlier, even when his then girlfriend came forward with her suspicions, was his good looks, his wholesome conservatism.

I can’t say I haven’t been a part of this male culture, that petri dish of male behavior. That would be a lie. Obviously, it’s a hard pill for many to swallow. I can say I have changed and that makes some men around me uncomfortable. Many men have changed in their acceptance of “fitting in, letting it fly, joining in on the cat calling”. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with admiring women, but we need to understand when admiring becomes something else. When male privilege is used as a weapon. How to recognize and stop it.

The best example of how things have changed is the reaction to Tom Brokaw’s words on Meet the Press. I think it’s great he spoke his mind, so we can learn, for two reasons. First, he represents a large swath of white male privilege that has maneuvered in a world they knew, understood, and succeeded. Let us not forget several women came forward accusing Brokaw of inappropriate behavior less than a year ago.

We have changed the world and everyone's prospective whether conservative men like it or not. We know where Brokaw stands, and it’s stark reality. He’s clearly out of touch, but he’s being honest about his views. He was taken aback by the reaction. Learning moment that he will most likely ignore.

Second, and very important, this is a testament to HOW news anchors, for the most part, worked. We are shocked because we had no idea of Brokaw’s views. We thought we did, by his seemingly unbiased reporting, or at least what we saw. This is what we have lost in the field of journalism. I’m not focusing one way or another about the level of HIS journalism, I’m pointing out the level of his attempt to be as unbiased a journalist as possible, and of an era we have to learn from, take the good and discard the bad. It’s clear, today, these types of men are having a hard time maneuvering, and that’s a good thing. Brokaw’s world had minimal Rush Limbaugh’s, Ann Coulter’s, Alex Jones’s, Breitbart’s, Fox News, etc..with such biased impact. It’s clear what they are fighting for is unfettered anonymity, in a world that has a magnifying glass on them.

We will loose if journalism begins to die, which I don’t believe it will. Journalism is transforming into something that never existed before (predominantly by the internet), controlled by the people instead of big conglomerates that dictate content. There’s no way right now to determine how this will end up. On one hand it’s extremely exciting to see such great writing and reporting by individuals, BUT these individuals need to put food on the table. The loss of news outlets will be devastating. Time will have to tell us how all this will work out.

SO…you’re asking what the hell does Tom Brokaw have to do with Ted Bundy? Everything! The past environment created a place where white male privilege could create the two extremes to flourish and grow. No one seemed to notice Ted Bundy, no one seem to notice a young freshman being led to a frat house, drunk and raped repeatedly at FSU. This world of navigation is being altered for men.

The future environment can no longer exist by ignoring what is right before our eyes about the past. This is why we are here. This was the outrage of Brett Kavanaugh, this was the words of Tom Brokaw honestly thinking his words were commonplace and acceptable. This is a long history of women being unseen, and less than. We won’t even get into the race war dynamics here.

We are living in one of the most important times, the most volatile of times, the most opportunistic times. We cannot go back! Our government, our streets are being flooded with fearful angry people who cannot stand for things to change. They cannot stop it, but they can ruin it. We have major work to do. We cannot wait any longer.

The Petri Dish of Male Behavior through the eyes of Ted Bundy

Action Not Fear

“What comes next? Expect massive efforts to keep Democrats from voting or prevent their votes from counting. The focus will be minority communities. I’ve spent years fighting suppression. I expect the worst election cycle we’ve ever experienced. We all have to fight for fairness.” @JoyceWhiteVance twitter
And right on cue posted on facebook by a nut job, “Trump approval among blacks hit 42%” WND-WorldNetDaily. Crap conservative news, more righter-wing than Fox News. Nobody buys this drivel, right?
We all know this is absolute fabrication paraded as fact, yet.
These people cling to what they want to believe, choosing to ignore rational thought. They have always done this. The difference now are numerous outlets that validate their craziness. There are countless ways to find what you want to hear and believe to validate your conspiracy idealism.
We are up against a very difficult beast to slay. Trump and Company have figured out how to tap into this right wing conspiracy crazies by validating, through media and government control, their underlying bigotry, hatred, and biblical piety masked as patriotism, nationalist pride, and dare I say, white supremacy.
It was always there, now exposed. This beast can only be slayed by truth alone. Dare I say, complete progressive ideas with no wiggle room.
This beast was a long time coming through the holes created by exposure to truth, historically and politically on BOTH sides of the spectrum, creating panic amongst everyone.
Columbus didn’t discover America, the Civil War did not end racism by abolishing slavery, reconstruction was squashed, lynching was viewed just like mass shootings today, as sad anomalies in our fabric that we could pray away.
The answer is not centrist regression that tries to shove the beast back into self-inflicted ignorance (you cannot erase exposure) by fear of what we dare ask for (democratic socialism (FDR)-Universal healthcare, higher wages, gender equality, etc.) The answer is a strong unity demand for these things without compromise because they are just and right. We must stand up against those that judge and ridicule others to lift up themselves as pious citizens, while others (usually of another race, economic status, or gender or sexually different than themselves) are seen as obviously lazy and decadent.
History shows us heroes who have tried and failed in the short term (Lincoln, Douglass, Kennedy, MLK, etc). Fear has always been a powerful tool to suppress, assassinating ideas as well as these heroes (funny how that word has double asses). When it works we get lynching, Holocausts and Tyranny.
It will never be easy to demand these things. Truths reveal ugliness, which are hard pills to swallow, but they are not whimsical ideas. They are not idealistic fantasies, they are truths. Obtainable truths. Isn’t that why we are here? Isn’t that what true faith is all about set to action.
I believe the beginning of our country, with all its flaws, was only possible through this boldness. Dumping British tea in Boston harbor, daring to face off against slavery, daring to believe truths were worth fighting for. Boldly starting anew. Can you imagine if in Dec 1773 those colonist that met at the Old South meeting house decided to listen to fear and say, “Let’s just wait this out. I’m sure King George won’t be in power much longer and the next King will be better.”? Fear.
We now know the complicated flaws of historical exposure, which will grow with new discoveries. Facing them head on must be the answer, not fear.
Yes, it will be easier to sit this out, hope the election will not be tainted, learn not to ask for things, let people die in abject poverty, let healthcare costs play Russian roulette with peoples families, etc.
I hope and pray we have the guts to choice the hard path.
“I am William Wallace, and I see a whole army of my countrymen, here, in defiance of Tyranny. You’ve come to fight as free men, and free men you are. What will you do without freedom? Will you fight?
Soldier: Fight? Against that? No! We will run! And we will live.
William Wallace: Aye. Fight and you may die. Run, and you’ll live…at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days, from this day to that, for one chance — just one chance — to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives but they’ll never take our freedom!-Braveheart

The Complexities of a Questioning Mind

Mary Delaney, my 3rd great grandmother, born in Ireland 1812–1896 died in Canada. Paid for her own gravestone with her own money and damn proud of it!

Everyone loves a good movie. Not everyone wants to see movies that are about history, even if it’s shown through the comfortable lens of a love story. Still, there is a desire for movies to resemble reality. Is that possible to achieve? That leads to a question about what I believe is the core draw of movies. Passion. What does passion mean, really?

Are we all born with a connection that is challenged and leads some to a disconnection? Or, are some people just born with too much passion that cannot be suppressed? I’m not talking about romantic passion, just that other thing no one, especially certain men who only want to discuss a passion related to sports, war, or domineering sex with a head butt, strong pat on the back or a guttural “yeah, man!”.

Photo by Olga Guryanova on Unsplash

I’m looking for the passion that makes you tick, through your own lens, through your self loneliness. Are you a one dimensional being without inner dialect or do you question and feel everything from the depths of your being? The latter being an extraordinary responsibility and burden, the former lending itself to self satisfying sleep induced satisfaction.

“Everything is blooming most recklessly; if it were voices instead of colors, there would be an unbelievable shrieking into the heart of the night.” Maria Rilke Rainer

Photo by Jeremy Lishner on Unsplash

Our knowledge of historical events is predicated from an early age by several factors. The strongest being a narrative that is handed down by the governing body of whatever nation you are born under. So, to a certain extent, you’re life is made comfortable by trusting that narrative completely. We all do it because we don’t have much of a choice. Don’t get me wrong, I believe we need this education. BUT, I also believe as adults, we should grow into questioning all narratives and search for our own meanings and truth. That journey requires a comfortability with endless unanswered questions, with an understanding of the ugliness of truth.

The people that change our viewpoint of history are the ones buried around us longing to tell us their stories if we would just dig enough to listen. Not just genealogical dates and places, but the impact historical events had on their lives, or just maybe, how they may have been a big part of that history. Take that to the furthest outposts of historical string theory and you might ask how the fall of the Ottoman Empire, the Russian Revolution, World War I, and the dissension into a tyrannical Hitler affects us today. You might ask about the roots of the slave trade economy throughout the world, manifested in the US south’s stranglehold on human bondage that would not release its grasp, while the North devoured cotton for their economic growth while demonizing the very industry they exploited. You might ask the most vital questions of all. Who decides what we know? Is there ever clearly defined right and wrong, black and white?

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

Nothing transpires out of thin air. Nothing worth knowing well is going to be easy. Answers lead to bigger questions, that lead to endless journeys of discovery and frustration. Yes, “the more you learn, the less you know” is partially right. The more you learn, the more you grow by realizing the less you know.

It’s clear some people make definitive choices to remain sure of what they think they know, then shut the door. This is called narrow minded oblivion. We’ve all seen enough of those types of zombie wanderers to last a lifetime. It’s safe, it helps you sleep better if your privileged enough for most things to not really affect your marking time in the comfort line.

The world is in complete chaotic change right now and the ones who are fearful of change are controlling the dialog. We have a golden opportunity to grasp and define our collective future if we all open our passionate hearts to the massive access to historical data. Passion meets documentation. We cannot look forward without learning from the past. It is vital. These are exciting times! These are terrifying times! Both are equally true. Are we up for invention in place of reaction?

It’s amazing to see norms evolve so fast now. What was acceptable oblivion in the recent past has become intolerable in our ever changing present. We have a golden opportunity to change the course of human interaction, humane responsibility, and a world without destruction with passion for the betterment of the collective. That huge challenge has never had a greater opportunity for success or failure than now.

We cannot go back, yet the idea of doing so is being shoved down our throats while we struggle for air. Will we rise or will we drown in our own inadequacies.

Photo by nikko macaspac on Unsplash

Perception

https://medium.com/@rousseauman123/perception-84675881a2d4

Perception

This is pretty simple to understand if you stop and reflect.  We, as American’s (US of A) have always had racists, bigoted aggressive people in our world.  Our recent history has always shown these people as minority schisms in our fabric, existing on the fringes of society until unmasked in contained cells of activity. Along came the 1990’s, then the turn of the century, marking a seemingly forward motion into equality. Perception. 

This is why we have such a large liberal base of sentimental views towards that era, that movement forward. At the same time, you have a moderate conservative sentimental view of the era of the 50’s where family values reined, good black people knowing their lot in life, good white families prospering in job growth, racism isolated to small areas of minority clashes. Segregation and Lynching minor soils on the landscape. Perception.

Today, we have a major problem.  The majority of Americans encompass these two views that can no longer stand the test of truth.  These two paths have not only collided, but exploded in our faces, opening up a large gaping hole that Donald Trump, Mitch McConnell, Lindsay Graham, Newt Gingrich walked right through.

The master of manipulation, Trump, met Perception and the virus was feed daily.  The racist, who knew better than to show themselves to anyone openly, except chosen confidants, began to test the Trump virus and see how open they could express their views. Not only were their egos stroked, but their own President shared their anger, their bigotry, their bold representation of manifest destiny cloaked in flag waving patriotism.  They rode their cars and trucks around neighborhoods displaying American Flags, Confederate Flags, decals of defiant boys pissing in the wind with a smirk on the face, gun posters, Hillary hating posters.  They were emboldened with their love of aggressive male rage, with their women supporters who found validation in their worth as blond idols to be worshiped by their whistle blowing, grabbing their junk in a sign of dominance, showing their women just who will protect them if they stand by their sides. Perception.

Liberals helped open this window as well with an inability to do anything without the approval of big money.  Giving Americans a facade of kumbaya utopia that really had no teeth.  Asking for equality nicely, without demanding strong legislation that was impenetrable to lies and manipulation, only willing to step lightly and ask for permission, unattainable perfection expected at every corner. Setting up criteria that was meager, then cowering to moneyed interests. Perception.  

This is a big mess and we will destabilize more than just the United States in our lack of addressing the huge steps that must happen going forward.  How do we manipulate a manipulator?  How do we convince someone who we perceive as stupid, yet clearly is smart enough to get more action happening than anyone before him, to see how he can benefit from benefiting our country’s stability?  Trump is 100% motivated by winning and continuing to remain rich and powerful.  How do you create an environment where he can have this temporary satisfaction yet be steered towards the betterment of our country and how we treat others?  I don’t have the answer, but I have ideas.  Does the liberal establishment have ideas?  We are told they do, yet never see action at play. This is where our Democratic leaders flounder.  If they are unwilling to remove Trump and his enablers, who know exactly how to manipulate him well, by Impeachment then they must have a strategy, and it must be shared. 

I do not believe that Pelosi has a concrete strategy other than let’s wait until 2020 elections which is not a strategy, it’s a cop out.  We must ask who’s interest she protects.  Does she really know anything about how middle America survives?  If not, why isn’t she listening?  Why is she, and other Democratic leaders, putting their connections to lobbyist at work for us?  Why do they cower to lobbyist interest over the common citizen? Why does it feel like she is patting us on the head and saying, “trust me, you’re not smart enough to understand political play”?  That is right back in the 1990’s political play book, and we need transparency now in 2019.  Why is Pelosi ostracizing Ocasio-Cortez?  She’s using the same pat on the head to her and it’s going to divide us deeper.

I’m just one questioning, learning, human being that deserves to be heard just like you.  We must ask questions, good questions of our representatives and not let them squirm out of difficult questions with rhetoric. We must hold our American journalist bosses to the flames for caring more about selling/ratings than newsworthiness. We must demand our journalist ask difficult questions and follow through with good retorts to lies and manipulation. We must stop accepting lawyers double talk, manipulating PERCEPTION to the advantage of whoever they deem valuable. 

We, American’s have a LOT on our plates.  We are at the same point that our first defiant citizens of this former British colony stood.  We can reshape this country into what it really was meant to be.  A flawed nation set on a course of unity, prosperity, and human dignity looking forward to change with reverence and humility, looking back with an unfiltered lens with responsibility and action to correct course, seeing that we are an immigrant and native melting pot.  That is the only PERCEPTION worthy of our time and efforts to change into reality.

I offer my humble opinion and service to this fight.  How about you?